Peer Response #2 Week 7

My response is on Drika's Improv

My Mom and Her Porkchops

My mom loves porkchops.

The way they soak up the seasonings,

Salt, pepper, and a hint of garlic.

The way the flour sticks to every edge

Creating the perfect crunch,

Especially on the fatty parts.

The way it sizzles when it hits the pan.

But when she was diagnosed,

They became bland, and bitter.

Their smell making bile

Rise in her throat.

She scratched porkchops

From the monthly shopping list.

Five months later

I could hear the pan sizzling

From my room.

My nose twitched at the

Unfamiliar smell.

And then I recognized it.

My mom was frying porkchops.

I haven’t read David Bottom’s version to be honest. So, I’m going to just comment on the poem in its own right. I loved the use of language and specificity when discussing how the pork chops soaked in the seasonings and how the flour created a crunch, especially the fatty parts. I could almost smell and taste the pork chops, even though I don’t really care for pork chops. Then, it turns when the mother gets diagnosed with what I assume was cancer and pork chops no longer hold the same meaning for her. They cause bile to rise in her throat. I liked the line ended on bile then the next line said “rises in her throat.” It caused me to notice that line more. Also, I noticed the avoidance of “rise up” because that’s usually what people say when something rises in their throat. You avoided it and stayed economical. Throat also isn’t Latin based so it’s more powerful. I found “scratched” a strong verb because that’s what we normally do when we check something off a list. Then, this piece twists again on me when the mother feels better. She feels better so she makes the pork chops again. Those pork chops are hope. Great job!